Original Song + Official Music Video
I did not translate this myself! This is just an adaptation of various translations I've found and cross-referenced in hopes of making a singable English version. I claim no credit to any part of the original song; I just wanted to see if I could put together English lyrics that actually scan and sounds decent, because I couldn't find any good English covers that I liked. I do not guarantee any accuracy: in fact, significant liberties were taken for both translation and rhyming purposes.
Please feel free to use these lyrics for an English cover if you want to! (So long as you give credit, I'd be honored :D)
Translations used: VocaDB translation (courtesy of Hazuki no Yume, whose original post is unfortunately gone), Meaningful Username's translation on the Vocaloid Lyrics Wiki.
Everyone gets just a little carried away
Criticizing, tearing into each other, every day
Like all we're here to do is kill the hours just playing
Games to hold off boredom till we finally kick the bucket*
As for me, I'm dead-eyed as a fish out on land
There's all this emptiness in my life that I simply can't stand
It's like I'm nothing but a lurker staring out into space
As hollow as the inside of my brain just tucked inside my face
Aaaah, there's no excitement to be found
So said I, still scrolling and still coming up empty
'till I found the best source of content around!
H-U-M-A-Ns! Hu-mans!
People call it gossip, I would call my
New favorite running soap, or novel on a dime
They say when you hold a grudge, dig two graves
And everything that goes around will come around, but hey--
Bash them 'till they cry but don't make them disappear,
Or if they do, well, RIP, but you won't blame a mere
Observer but maybe the righteousness will be just enough
To finally drive them from this world
[instrumental break]
Through the loudest megaphones right to the sheep's ears
It's a matter of great justice to make sure you all hear
Are you with us or against us, do you wanna disappear?
If you've ever heard of nuance we don't do that nonsense here
OP is a thief, a liar, p*dophile, no--
It doesn't matter, what's important is that you oughtta know
Not that any of it matters once the story starts growing
What compares to the Real Human Drama show?
Aaah, I just want to live in peace
But it's so much fun to read about it all happening
To somebody that I don't know personally!
H-U-M-A-Ns! Hu-mans!
People call it gossip, I would call it my
New favorite way to rubberneck till we all crash and die
As catchy as music, let's all have some fun!
And flame each other until we burn brighter than the sun
Make this guy our fave for lulz, until we're bored
Then sacrifice him to the growing gossip horde
We're starving for content, so why not cut open
The underbelly of humanity?
Maybe it's a little mean (OK! OK!)
Maybe it's a little much (OK! OK!)
Maybe this has gone too far (OK! OK!)
Maybe this is dangerous (OK! OK!)
OK! OK! OK! OK! OK! OK! OK! OK! [x4]
R.I.P. to those drowned in this sea
Still sinking in those waters salty as can be
My friends have all ended up down in its depths
The shore's so far away, I wonder if we're next?
Isn't it sad?
Isn't it sad...?
Isn't it saaad?!?
Hah! LOL, JK!
People call it gossip, I would call my
New favorite running soap, or novel on a dime
They say when you hold a grudge, dig two graves
And everything that goes around will come around, but hey--
Bash them 'till they cry but don't make them disappear,
Or if they do, well, RIP, but you won't blame a mere
Observer, but maybe the righteousness will be just enough
To really kill off somebody--
People call it gossip, I would call it my
New favorite way to rubberneck till we all crash and die
As catchy as music, let's all have some fun!
And flame each other until we burn brighter than the sun
Make this guy our fave for lulz, until we're bored
Then sacrifice him to the growing gossip horde
We're starving for content, so why not cut open
The underbelly of humanity?
I just wanna keep on watching, watching, watching
I just wanna see the drama unfolding
I just wanna keep on watching, watching, watching
I just wanna see these people keep going
I just want to keep watching humanity**
*Games to hold off boredom till we finally kick the bucket
When I composed this translyric, I misremembered there being an extra little riff at the end of the verse/line here? But listening to the song again nowadays, I've realized there isn't one, oops. If you want to keep closer to the original rhythm, a substitute lyric might be "To hold off boredom wasting all our precious years away?" I dunno, I just improvised that one now.
**I just want to keep watching humanity
The original line is different enough that this has bugged me for years, but it flowed better so I kept it. If you want something closer to the original meaning and energy, "Through the foggy fisheye lens, I see" also works. (I've been considering replacing it...)